Learn to Teach

Today is the finale of the March Challenge. While endings can be difficult, we also have a new beginning. With the coming of spring and the month of April, I feel refreshed and will challenge myself to keep up my daily writing habit it all forms. I am inspired by calls to read and write poems for poetry month and am inspired by all the teacher-writers I encountered this month. Thank you to anyone and everyone who read and commented. Thank you to my #TeachWrite community for encouraging me to keep up my habit. Thank you to Two Writing Teachers for this platform and space to share. Happy Spring and Happy Continued Writing!

The sun is out and finally so am I My winter blues have gone away I’m feeling renewed and anticipating the lightness of spring There is beauty in the world again I see it in the blue sky I see it in quality time with friends People out enjoying the sun I’ve reached the light at the end of the tunnel Spring is truly here

To weekends To relaxing To Netflix To tacos To rest To writing To challenges To trying To putting yourself out there To inspiration To hitting publish To sharing comments To reflecting To connecting To writers block To perseverance To keeping up To not giving up

"Yo His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti He's nervous, but on the surface, he looks calm and ready..." To quote Eminem's Lose Yourself,  I felt very nervous for my big speech tonight. I helped start our first World Language Honor Society at my school.  I was definitely nervous for this small but to me very important public speaking event. I gave the introduction speech and had prepared and even had my students and my fiance give me feedback. The day went on and the periods flew by and the hour was upon us. I was definitely nervous as I stepped up to the podium, however, once I started speaking, I felt calm. I tried to slip in a joke about grammar that unfortunately didn't land, but otherwise, it was a success. Parents, teachers, and admin were happy and the whole event went relatively smoothly, despite the wifi at school being down all day. So I am grateful for a job wel...

Today was an in school PSAT and SAT day for sophomores and juniors. Tests were supposed to take up the morning then lunch then running on our normal bell schedule where students attended Periods 1, 2, and 3. However, expectations often do not meet reality. I went to my classroom to prep for my first period. The proctoring teacher had not eaten so I relived his shift so he could eat before teaching his first period. The minutes ticked by and we waited. We were told not to release students until the announcement over the PA system. The minutes became an hour and it was clear something did not go according to plan. As an obsessive planner myself, I was frustrated and flustered, unsure what to tell the students in my room. I listened intently in the hall to glean any information as I tried to keep the aura of calm for the kids. Waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting AND WAITING Finally, the familiar sound of the "be...

Buzz Buzz Enter I try to re-enter the 1000th password I can remember and I am still locked out. I scan my brain trying to recall my most recently updated password. Passwords are a puzzle I will never solve. There are too many. Four different email accounts, countless newsletters and listserves. I can never seem to unlock the code. I am trapped. I try again. Buzz Buzz Enter "Forgot your password?" The glaringly familiar and unhelpful phrase. It taunts me and mocks me. I am always forgetting my password. March has been a long haul and at many times I have reached a wall and been "locked out". Locked out of creativity, free time, quality writing, remembering to do something on my endless to-do list. But luckily for me, I will reset my passwords and be logged in soon enough. Type Enter Access granted

Wake up at 6:30 Make coffee Get dressed Take subway to school Press play on podcast Teach Period 1 Teach Period 2 Prep for Period 4 Teach Period 4 Meeting/lunch Meeting Teach Period 7 Prep for Period 9 Teach Period 9 Clean up room Plug in school iPad Press play on podcast Subway home

Bright sun Fresh coffee Blue skies Warm weather Winter retreated Spring has sprung New beginnings New adventures Taking time to enjoy Appreciate the beauty Smile creeping up Darkness fades Lightnes enters I am awake

The long haul to break is here. We still have a little over a month until our spring break. Kids are tired and stressed and teachers are tired and stressed. Luckily we have our normal short day today as we have PD every Friday afternoon. It’s another day of rain and while yesterday it made me feel cleansed, but today it makes me feel drowsy. I long to go home and curl up with a good book and a hot cup of tea. Despite my grogginess, I’ve found some joy in my colleagues who have gone out of their way to make me smile. One of my friends and colleagues came up to visit one of my classes during her prep. I haven’t seen her in what feels like weeks and quickly catching up with her was a breath of fresh air on this dreary day. Today I concentrate my gratitude on supportive colleagues who have becom great friends.

It’s rainy today but I don’t mind. The kids are tired but busy at work for the most part. I gave them a choice board for studying for our verb quiz tomorrow. They enjoyed acting as “question master” where they created their own questions and tested each other. The air is calm and I can’t help but feel the spring renewal on its way. It’s been a dark and often challenging winter but the rain is cleansing and brings the promise of a joyful end to the year.

This week is tough. We are in the month of no breaks and we have a month until Spring Break. I’ve been fighting off headaches due to fatigue, illness, allergies, or all of the above. But today I had a great conversation with a student about the recent cancellation of the Netflix show One Day at a Time. My student shared with me his frustration about the decision especially with a lack of Latinx representation on network television. He shared how the variety of issues from harassment to LGBTQ relationships to single parenting. This student also remarked how in his opinion, Fuller House is not a show relevant to issues today and does not represent diverse perspectives. This student raised so many great points and I was pleased to give him the space to be heard. A Netflix show may not seem like the most important topic, but I was so inspired by the passion my student had and the real examples he used to highlight his points. I hope for my student and for all fans of the show that Netflix ...

Tired, anxious, on edge Later than usual Less time to plan Less time to prepare Bell rings Students file in Feeling unsettled Students are chattier than normal Spring fever in full swing Unprepared for the lack of focus Feeling tension start to build Students not completing the work Repeating instructions four times Less patient Frustrated Losing all sense of calm Pause Breathe deep Take a minute Release the tension The day has only just begun

In today's edition of "kids say the darndest things", I had a student who walked into our second-period French class with only 10 minutes left in the period. I know that this student lives within walking distance. I also know this student is a great story-teller. Towards the end of the class period, while students were completing their final class activity, I went over to the late student eager to hear his excuse for today. He explained that he was late because "my turkey ran out of his cage". I was surprised and amused by this story.  "So I went to the slaughterhouse on Friday to pick up a guinea fowl and a turkey" he began. "I had the turkey in a cage in my living room. This morning, my grandma woke me up and yelled 'the bird is out of its cage!' So I got up and went running around outside my house to find the turkey. Then my grandpa woke up and yelled 'what's going on here?' Then I told him about the turkey. So anyway, th...

Sunday’s are days filled with calm and anxiety. By day I’m relaxing enjoying time writing, reading, doing yoga. By night, I’m beginning to lesson plan and go over my mental checklist for the week and do my laundry. It’s easy to get overwhelmed in monotonous tasks and become consumed with fear about what things the week can unexpectedly throw. But tonight I’m taking time to set aside my anxiety and to enjoy some much needed rest and relaxation with my fiancé. Tonight I take some more time than normal to refresh and reset.

The soft glow of the sun The morning breaks I look up and breathe The weekend is here A time for rest A time for calm The warmth of the bed begging me to stay The checklist is my head quieting down The comfort of the morning The peace of a day without grades or emails Mornings like this I’ll always cherish

Today I take the invitation from my colleague Christie  https://wonderingandwondering.wordpress.com/2019/03/03/your-happyparty-invite-has-arrived-solc19/ Here’s my happy this week: I celebrate the warmer weather and the coming of spring after a cold and extreme winter. I’m happy for students willing to help me out when they can tell I’m overwhelmed. I celebrate family in town seeing the sights of New York City and including in me in fun plans to see shows and spend time together. I’m happy for supportive colleagues who are also friends. I celebrate my family near and far who are only a text or call away. I’m happy for the weekend to rest and recharge. Wishing everyone a happy Friday and a good weekend!

     Thursday is quiz review day. Students walked in groggily to first period with an air of stress, fatigue, and teenage angst only a high school teacher can recognize. Lucky for the kids, I chose to do a Kahoot review.  Upon the announcement, the normal excitement was met with silence. One student asked, "will there be a prize?" I responded, "there will be candy given to the first and second place winners". Students immediately perked up and quickly got out their devices to play the game.    As an educator, I'd love for some intrinsic motivation. I'd relish kids learning for the sake of earning. But on this tired Thursday in March, the infamous month with no breaks, a sweet external motivator was called for.

During my seventh period ESL stand-alone class yesterday, one of my students walked in bubbly and excited as usual. She sat down and said, “So Ms. Hubbard, a funny thing happened in Math today.” We work on her English and social studies in my class but she struggles with math and often asks a fellow student who loves math to help reexplain difficult concepts to her. These two students are friends but often a horrible pair when it comes to math. He gets so frustrated and tells her “it’s so easy” and she gets angry and retorts “for you!” She is a shy-seeming student at first but is never afraid to speak her mind. I know her struggles with math so I could only imagine what happened in math that morning. “So we’re graphing inequalities and learning about how to do it. So I raised my hand and said I had a question.” My first reaction was pride. I thought how glad I was she was speaking up and asking for help. But as I saw the smirk on her face, I realized her question was not to clari...

Last week I had a lot of confidence in my teaching. I had what I felt was a successful observation and a great post observation discussion. Then cane back the dreaded evaluation sheet. I always get anxious for the actual hard copy evaluation that has my rating. But today when I walked into the office and saw the envelope waiting for me, I was confident that I’d receive high ratings based on our conversation. Unfortunately, there were more than a few “developing rankings”. This is the level 2 rank and is basically code for “not up to par”. These ratings on a few key elements including the pedagogy of the lesson, classroom management, and assessment were apparently not up to par. I’m really disheartened as I felt really confident and felt I’ve been making improvemts. This makes me feel like maybe I’m not so great after all. I can’t help but think of how students feel when they revive an assessment. I really try to give them real constructive feedback and give them the ways they can impro...

Today is Monday after Daylight Savings. We lost an hour of sleep and even though my first and second periods don't seem to have lost any sleep and seem full of energy, I for one am feeling the loss of that one hour. I am grateful that it will be light out again once I leave school, but today was a little challenging to get up. I arrived at school groggy with my giant travel coffee thermos in hand, and as always, a few students walked into my room to hang out before the first-period bell. Sometimes, like this morning, I was not quite ready for the teenage energy of my students at 8 am. But today as I was taking attendance while students were completing the "Do Now" activity I decided to make a choice. I often feel a lot of stress and even some anxiety or sometimes annoyance when I lack energy and my students come into the room bursting with energy and having animated conversations about their weekends. Today I realized I needed to "give 'em the 'ole razzle d...

Today my fiance and I had the privilege of being volunteer judges for NYC History Day at the Museum of the City of New York. As avid history buffs, I am so grateful to have shared this experience together. Students can perform, create websites, create documentaries, posters or papers surrounding the annual theme. The theme this year was Triumph and Tragedy and students were tasked with selecting a historical event that highlighted both elements. This was an amazing and inspiring day where middle and high school students were able to showcase their hard work and where I could work with other educators to observe and evaluate the projects. Students who place here will be going to the state competition and those who place at state will then go to nationals. I was so glad to have the opportunity to see so many students passionate about history in a world filled with social media and focus on the now. I hope to share this event with colleagues an...

Happy International Womens Day! Today I celebrate my mom who inspires me, my grandmothers who care for me, my aunts who always have my back, and my cousin’s who are my best friends. I celebrate my sister in law who shows me the balance of hard work and caring fiercely for others. I celebrate my amazing female colleagues who I can commiserate with, share hardships and fun experiences with, and who have my back personally I professionally. I also celebrate all my male allies who support women achieving equal rights and equal pay and believe I am just as strong and intelligent. Cheers to celebrate the power of women! Have a wonderful Friday!

On some days, teaching feels invigorating and I feel like most, not all, but most of my lessons are a hit. On other days, days like today where I feel drained at the thought of staying at school fro 12 hours for parent teacher conferences, I feel like the day drags. I try to reflect back on days like these and rewind moments in my mind. How could I have handled the issue with that particular student differently? What students am I giving attention to and who is someone that could use extra support or a brief conversation? Las year, in my first year of teaching, I found my rewinds were often negative, " I should've done this differently". This year, I'm trying hard to find the positive moments, what did a student say that made me laugh? Who did I connect with today that I now know a little better? Days like today where I'm tired and drained and feeling like I'm running on empty, it isn't easy to feel positive but I know how much a kind gesture or comment f...

If you give students the opportunity to debate and you’ve prepared them with a wealth of resources, Will they participate successfully? Today my answer was no. I found that my best laid plans were unsuccessful. Some students were well prepared with notes while others had no idea we were doing a debate. My success rate is not particularly high with this class, but at our second attempt at a more formal class discussion I had high hopes. I’m feeling down on myself like I let them down. But I’m trying to take the unsuccessful lesson in stride and use what happened today to improve the next time. If at first you don’t succeed, revise your lesson plan.

Nothing says welcome back to school after a snow day like an observation. Luckily I was well prepared using my snow day to get everything ready and printed for me lesson. I can’t say it’s much easier as a second year teacher than a first year. I still feel the spotlight on me and pressure to be asking higher level questions, differentiating, and managing behavior all while speaking French. Luckily, I was speaking French right as my observers walked in. The kids were engaged for the most part working together using maps and speaking and writing in French. I had a small hope after yesterday’s snow day my observation might’ve been rescheduled, but now that is over I can breathe a sigh of relief. Observations often don’t come in the best of circumstances but I’m feeling calm and fairly confident in my lesson. Here’s to smooth sailing the rest of the week.

Today I am grateful for a snow day. I have just come back from back to back trip. The first, an amazing trip to Europe with my students, and the second a funeral. I've been jet lagged and emotional and I am grateful to have space and time to myself to rest and recharge today. Last week due to all the travel and grief, I was very stuck and felt on edge. I felt easily irritated and found myself neglecting grades in order to try to be present for my family as they grieved. I felt like a bad teacher. I often feel this difficult balance and sometimes find it difficult to be a good teacher and good friend, relative, significant other. I feel sometimes when I feel I'm doing really well as a teacher, my personal life is not as nourished and I don't feel my relationships are being well cultivated. But to the opposite, if I feel I am being a good friend/daughter/significant other, I am not necessarily a good teacher. I am so grateful to have today to pause and rest and reflect. I h...

Lately I’ve been waking up early Sometimes a few minutes, sometimes an hour Some days there’s so much anticipation, it’s hard for me to rest March is a month of no breaks from school It’s a month of transition It’s often  difficult and  goes by slow Waking up early I’m caught up in my to do lists But today I seek to take a moment Pause Listen to the silence Embrace the calm before the day begins

It’s hard for me to stay still I don’t like quiet I like to move I like to do things I like to be active Even when I’m inactive, I’m listening to music or watching something Stillness is stagnant Stillness feels stuck Stillness feels unproductive Teaching is a crazy job that demands so much So much time, so much effort, so much movement I want to try to embrace the stillness and enjoy moments of calm But as I sit here by the fireplace and watch snow fall I can’t help but itch to move, to do, to create I feel uncomfortable in the stillness It reminds me I’m alone It makes me anxious even afraid I long to enjoy the calm But the stillness makes me stiff